18 Years of an Entrepreneurial Journey and 3 Resignations

I didn’t think it would turn out like this.
Eighteen years ago, I said: “I’m going.”

I left a safe job.

People around me panicked.
Fear.
Those looks that say:

“Are you sure?”
“Are you crazy?”
“Marjana, are you really throwing away a perfectly good life?”

I stopped explaining.
They weren’t hearing me anyway.
They were mostly hearing themselves. Their fear.

My great fortune was that at home, there was one voice that said:
“Try.”

And I did.
And I never looked back.

The first six months?
Like a vacation.
But a vacation where doubt comes to visit.
Uncertainty.
A strange sense of emptiness.

And yet, something in me knew.
That quiet part, calm like a forest after rain, held me.

And it held me through all three further transformations over those eighteen years.

Do you know what it’s like
to fire yourself as an entrepreneur?

On Friday you say:
“This is no longer it. This is no longer me.”

On Saturday you wander aimlessly, a knot in your stomach.
On Sunday you breathe. Of course, you don’t sleep.

And on Monday you ask yourself:
“So… what will I employ myself as now?”

It takes months to find yourself again.
A new self.
A new business model.
A new source of income.

Sometimes I hear comments like:
“Well, you can afford to take summers off to surf.”
“You can go to the mountains in the middle of the week.”
“You can take time for California, for education.”

But every entrepreneur knows this:

Freedom has a brother. His name is uncertainty.
And a sister. Her name is emptiness.

And fortunately, a cousin too: courage — and action. 🙂

2024?
Another year that smelled like transformation.
A project I poured myself into came to an end.

What remained was silence.
Empty space.

My calendar for December 2025: empty.

I didn’t run away.
I stayed.

And there, in the emptiness…
something began to grow again.

As if life hands you a blank page
and asks:

“So — what now?”

At 53, this feels like a perfectly healthy question:
How do I want to live this final part of my productive path?

Not as a strategy.

As a life.

I know who I am.
I know what I can do.
I know what I want to give.

I am no longer looking for crowds.
I am looking for collaboration. Presence.
That aliveness that happens when someone says:

“Yes. Let’s do it. Despite this. Or precisely because we don’t know.”

I no longer fit into environments where fear is the loudest voice.
No hard feelings — there’s just no dance there.

But those who feel the urgency of change?
The challenge of this time?

With them, I can work.
With them, I breathe more easily.
That’s where we create more.

Entrepreneurship didn’t only teach me business.
It taught me how to shed my skin when it becomes too tight.

Or when life itself invites you forward.

And even though it can be uncomfortable at times…
it is, above all, beautiful.

It is evolution.

🎁 Oh — one more thing:
This year, I won’t be paying myself a Christmas bonus.

I think I deserve it.
But the “goalkeeper” in my company — and in my bank account — said:
“Sorry. No.”

I’m not traumatized.
Because bonuses come in many forms.
And governments too. More on that another time.

What matters is life.
The life within me.

And those of you who have walked this path with me — you know who you are.
There are many of you.
Thank you. ❤️

Marjana Laibacher Rogelj

Companion in the winding paths of development

Leadership Maturity Coach, Systemic Team Coach Practitioner

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